Not just cheep laughs, weird ones too.

I don't know if you know this, but I don't laugh very often. I snicker, chuckle, chortle, but I hardly ever laugh. I'm not much of a laugher. I might watch an amusing program on television with some sort of semi retarded grin on my face, but that's just the pot talking. Generally, I don't find much to be very funny. I can remember the last time I had a really good laugh, and it was a while ago. I mean, I'm not this super grim misanthropist that scowls all the time (well...) but I'm not some hyena that laughs at the likes of Dane Cook or Robin Williams. I can't go to stand up comedy anymore because I don't laugh and it can be really off putting for the performers. That and I heckle. But anyway, some things do make me laugh, but they are mainly private things, my own jokes, things that I can look back on that will make me smile. To understand what I mean, let me explain.

Just near my house on my way to work there is a dead rat on the ground. He has gone from the decomposing stage (which I thankfully missed) to being leather stretched over bones, the "dry decay" stage, and if you are interested in the stages of decomposition, visit this helpful website. I like to refer to him as "My nigga on the rot", you know, so when I'm walking past I can say that 'I'm pouring a little out for my nigga on the rot'. Yes yes, we all hate the N-word but after years of listening to rap I no longer feel the stigma that most other guilty neo-liberal white males feel.

Anyway, he has been there so long that I have decided he is in desperate need of some love.

So I have been feeding him.

If I am walking past I drop of piece of whatever food I am eating at the time as near as his jaws as I can get. He has had some apple, some of my morning porridge and yesterday I found him a little sippy cup so that I can fill it with a beverage. In case he gets thirsty. He is, literally, as dry as a bone.

This makes me laugh. I am laughing right now. At many things, for instance, the image of me standing there pouring porridge onto a dead rats face whilst some neighbour peeks out from behind their curtains. Or the weird mis on scene that someone is confronted with when they walk past very dead rat surrounded by foodstuffs and a cup.

Oh I wish I had pictures to prove it. As they say on the internets, 'pics or it didn't happen'. I went past this morning and the grass was freshly mowed, all that was left was a very broken plastic cup. I can only imagine what happened to the rat. Goodbye my friend.


Also, I'd like to thank another friend of mine, a living one this time, for making the header that is now on this blog. I'd name and shame, but that's not how we play around here. But seriously, thank you. It is much appreciated. And so, this blog is dedicated to you. I've got nothing but love.